holy crap 50 is fun

omg, 50 is so fun, Paige.  

don't expect me to bother on the capitalization of proper nouns here, ok?

my palms are glued to the space adjacent to the tracking touch pad of my little brushed aluminum macbook which is "THE LORD" of my world.  I worship here everyday, for hours at a time.  my macbook is my portal to the world, to the grid, and the deep dark mystery of outer space.  it is just so fecking cool to tap into all the universal wisdom available to each and every one of us.  even you, paige.  ':*}

Paige, you are cordially invited  to ALLOW divine source energy to move through you. one of the very clear messages of 2008 was for me to get out of the way and let the good stuff do it's thing.   cuz i'm doing it to share the wealth that universal knowledge imparts:  connect to Source and let it flow through YOU. STOP BLOCKING IT with, "ZOMG, I AM NOT WORTHY!!"   Source will go where it goes which is always to the light.  always paige, every single time.  i know you are Divine.  turn your head around about who you think you are and let the LIGHT define who you are.

 jeez, I'm getting all preachy here and i didn't mean to but there is a voice in me that wants to be shouting about what is possible if we will only take a year to WORK at changing our perception of reality.  My friend Sonja and I went to Kripalu intstitute last year, or, at least I , er, think it was last year....

We went cuz I wanted to finally meet Carolyn Myss and she was giving a seminar on her work with Saint Theresa, of the Carmelites.  Myss had been speaking to me through audio tapes I listened to for ten solid years.  Specifically, her work on Anatomy of the Spirit and Sacred Contracts proved tremendously valuable in speeding up my ability to process energy and information on this earth walk. 

So, I show up to Kripalu Institute to meet my guru and what I find is agitation, arrogance and unpreparedness.  To make a long story short, I presented Ms. Myss with one of her own "archetype cards".  I presented her with the Bully...my Divine Child marched up to her and said, "will you autograph this please?".  She eyeballed me like a crow, made some excuse about being in a hurry and then fumbled and naffed about finding a pen.  But paige, she signed that Bully card!  She chooses  to use that energy to protect herself and I admire her for that.  She knows that part of her personality employs the methods of the bully to serve the great work of the teacher and mystic.

Know thyself.  That is your mission.  Use the force Paige!  USE THE FORCE!

Thank you Sue Moore

As a Junior at Soquel High School in 1975, I was presented the gift of a teacher with a kind heart.  Her name was Sue Moore and she advised me in English independent study: we made an agreement that I would read one book per week and sit down and discuss it with her.  She inspired me to move beyond The Witch of Blackbird Pond in my literature choices.  Reading was a passion and I  reported to Sue on a weekly basis during the spring semester of 1975.  I was suffering some serious health issues with asthma during that year and she brought in a healer who diagnosed "stacked ribs".  

When I told my mom what the healer had said she was angry because she didn't understand what "stacked ribs" meant.  I don't think I did either, but I just wasn't able to communicate to my mom how comforting it was to have someone look at me and tell me why I was in so much pain.  Who knows what she meant by "stacked ribs", but in retrospect, it sounds like a chiropractic issue.  Chiropractic medicine, even in Santa Cruz, was a few years off from becoming part of the zeitgeist of new age healing.

A little internet research has unearthed her 1963 Eureka High School  photograph.  Sue is the lovely flower on the right, third row down.  Isn't she beautiful?  I see her kind heart shining through her lovely eyes.   Sue inspired me to seek a spiritual path.  It would be another 13 years before I found the path or it found me, but Sue instilled in me a desire to seek divinity and for this I am eternally grateful. 

Grateful, I am  to Sue, for sharing the B'ahai faith with me.  She was a teacher who gave me a template to live by...a piece of paper I still have:  black ink on goldenrod card stock, in a protective sleeve.  Thank you, Sue Moore.  Thank  you.  

As soon as I locate the piece of paper, I'll post what it says.

Om Shanti,

Connie

Dear Paige: Comfort Food

Recipe for Chocolate Blanc Mange, aka Chocolate pudding that Stands on it's Head!

1. Pour yourself a glass of wine. Or Tequila.
2. Find a pan in the completely disorganized cupboard cabinet. A pan
that will hold
at least six cups of fluid. (you won't need six cups of anything,
except perhaps wine or tequila).
3. Put 4 squares (remember 4-square from 4th grade and how ya wanted
to possess the
coolest trinket to throw for hop-scotch?) of semi-sweet Bakers
Chocolate in the pan you pulled
out of the disaster relief cupboard cabinet that has all the pots in
it. (Martha Stewart says that aluminium is the cause of Alzheimer's,
so if it's an aluminium pot you've chosen?: DRINK UP SHRINERS!)
4. Turn the heat on high. On the stove I mean, not with the DH. You
will instantly realize that if you keep the flame this high you will
have scorched chocolate forever embossed on the bottom of this pan,
which is going to give you Alzheimer's anyway, so have another sip of
wine/tequila and throw in a half a cup of milk to the chocolate, turn
the heat down to medium and start whisking it with a wire whisk. The
milk and the chocolate.
5. Beg the milk/chocolate not to curdle/scortch/burn/emboss while you
neglect it a second to find the cornstarch way in the back of the
pantry or cupboard. You may have to fight off the moths that have
bloomed out of that bag of flour you bought four months ago, but,
PERSERVERE, cuz this is comfort food and your family is not going to
care that you are sauced on wine/tequila when they taste what you have
created. 6. where were we?
7. In the pantry, looking for cornstarch. Go whisk the milk/chocolate
mixture cuz it's been more than a second or two by now, but do find
the cornstarch and put it in a PYREX 16 oz. measuring cup. Only 3
TABLESPOONS of it though, and add a 1/4 cup of milk [a two second
pour as they say in the BIZ] and stir it really fast with the fork
(You know, the one you turn the bacon with. ) you've left on the
counter since breakfast, so that milk and constarch BLEND, not lump.
8. GET BACK TO THE STOVE!
9. Whisk the the milk/choc. mixture another little while while it
slowly builds to a boil. You could hasten this by turning up the
heat, but, what the hell, there's all this wine/tequila to be drunk
and you've got time!
10. When the milk/choc. starts to boil, re-stir the cornstarch/milk
with the bacon/fork and whisk it into the now slowly/bubbling milk/
choc. which is in the pan you got from the Martha/Stewart nightmare
cabinet that DH never actually finished /sanding/staining/painting.
10. The pan! It's on the stove! WHISK what is in it!
11. Ok. calm down. Just turn the knob for FR down to low and slowly
whisk this velvety smooth, milk/choc/cornstarch melange that is
brewing in the Alzheimer's pot. Set the timer for 2.75 minutes and
breathe. Whisk slowly: this is a delightful dessert you are creating
for your family cuz you love them so much.
12. Refill wine/tequila glass.
13. BINGBONG...time's up.
14. Turn the stove off.
15.FOCUS
16. Find the toast crumb/peanut butter smeared butter and toss in 1
TBL. NO! Not into the wine/tequila. Into the pudding, dammit. How
can you have your pudding if you won't eat your meat?????
17. Take a breath. Find the vanilla. Eyeball a teaspoon of it and
throw it in the pot of pudding. WHISK, girl, WHISK! (Did you know
that Tequila, I mean Vanilla has ALCOHOL in it???)
18. ZOMG, you are done! NO, you are not! Find some cute little bowls
that match the number of eyes pleading with you to feed them. Divide
that number by half. This is how many bowls of pudding you need to
fill now. Fuck the dog, he's a dog, he doesn't get any! OK. Let him
lick the Alzheimer's pan once it's cooled off a bit and you've filled
the bowls with pudding.
19. Cover the little serving sized bowls with Martha Stewart Saran
Wrap/Handi Wrap. Do this only for the family members who despise
"skin" (oh, have another drink of wine/tequila) on their pudding. Put
the bowls in the fridge. Or outside on the sidewalk, this is ALASKA
by God!
20. Wait a while. Drink wine/tequila to taste.
21. Get the bowls in from the sidewalk and invert them onto little
saucers or the dog's dish if you insist on feeding him PEOPLE FOOD!
Hand out spoons to dip into these amazing mounds of chocolate pudding
you've made that can actually hold their shape when you turn them
upside down.
22. Send DH out into the snow for more wine/tequila.
Bon Apetite!!

xoxo
Connie

Michael Vick's Dogs

If I hadn't gone to the dentist for my check up yesterday, I wouldn't have seen this months issue of Sports Illustrated and I wouldn't have picked it up to find the article about the dogs that survived the ordeal perpetrated by a pro football star and Virginia native named Michael Vick.  I wouldn't have read the article, wouldn't have wept for the grace of it all, wouldn't have been grateful to the dog lovers out there who believed the dogs should be granted salvation.  92% of Michael Vick's dogs survived their ordeal and have been fostered or adopted.   My limited experience with pit bulls is that they are very sweet dogs and love affection and attention, just like any other dog.  Maybe more so! 

It's a good story. You can read it here if you like.  

There is also a blog devoted to the dogs and it's written by the dogs so that's pretty entertaining.  I agree with Gandhi: "the greatness of a nation and it's moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated."  Leona Helmsley is one extreme, Michael Vick is the other end of the spectrum. In between there are millions of devoted animal lovers in America whose lives are daily enriched by the animals they share their homes with. 

For this I am truly grateful.

Connie

vocabulary

ART:  THE TRANSMUTATION OF IMAGINATION INTO PHYSICAL FORM.

LOVE:  MOLECULAR POWER  CAPABLE OF TRANSFORMING

STASIS  INTO REVOLUTION.  

(a. what makes the planet spin)

BHAKTI YOGI:  ONE WHO LIVES WITH AN OPEN HEART

OM SHANTI:  PEACE

NAMASTE`:  I HONOR THE DIVINE WITHIN YOU.

ALOHA:  WELCOME.  UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN.

For this I am most grateful,

Connie

Exciting

My god this is an exciting time to be alive!
A Mac user for ten years now, I have watched the technological boom of the internet in the past ten years accelerate our physical universe to such a degree  that I can't help but comment on the acceleration of my spiritual journey as well.

I stepped onto my spiritual path in 1989, a conception that took the form of a mysterious yearning and pull of desire from the Eastern door of the Spirit world. That door opened and something shifted in me. A collective unconscious woke up and beckoned me to explore the unseen world behind my eyes.

I felt called to explore further, the recesses of my mind for spirit tools that might illuminate the unseen forces of polarity...black and white, good and evil, love and fear. I sought to become familiar with a language that ponders and gives definition to the big words like God and Death and Love and Forgiveness and Altered States of Consciousness and Integration and Soul and Giftedness and Blessings.    I started pursuing a greater knowledge and a deeper understanding of what it would mean to makes choices based on spiritual integrity.  

What is spiritual integrity?  Spiritual integrity is the capacity to honor the higher Self, and live a code of conduct revealed by the power of Universal Knowledge.

My journey has brought me to the conclusion that each of us has the capacity to reach enlightenment through the pineal gland of the human brain.  How one gets to it is not relevant.  My own journey includes the ancient wisdom of the Yoga traditions and all the gifts of binding body and spirit inherent in the Yogic practice.

In 2008 I had the opportunity on a few occasions to break through the veil of the time/space continuum and for tiny seconds, to experience the luminous nature of some Cosmic Light where all answers to any question is to be found.   While in this state, I received this message:

"You have the capacity to infuse every cell of your being with love". 

For the sake of clarity, this message is tantamount to Divine instruction:  to live this life in love. 

Right, like that's a piece of cake!  

Difficult people are such amazing teachers arent' they?  I am so grateful to the difficult ones, the ones you try my last nerve or drag me kicking and screaming to emotional places I'd really rather not go. But they do. The difficult ones come along often  to remind me what it is to be human and flawed and unhappy or scared or unloved or whatever it is they are showing me, offering their pain up like a sacrifice, daring me to respond with love rather than venom, with civil concern rather than arrogance.  That's what spiritual integrity means to me:  to make the purpose of my life to treat others with love and when I fail do so, to notice, and make it right through metta prayer,  a prayer of loving kindness.

This is my prayer of loving kindness for you:

May you be well and happy. 

May you rejoice in the knowledge 

that you have the capacity to reach

enlightenment through the pineal

gland of your brain. 

May you infuse every cell of your

being with love.

Om Shanti,

Connie